I guess I can say that Blake has made me who I am today. Blake was born September 29, 1982.  Prior to his birth, I silently knew that I was going to have a son with Down’s Syndrome, I guess mother’s know that sort of thing. At that time, I was working in a fast paced business, selling lumber wholesale in the Bay Area.  Along with taking care of the house, my husband and 2 other boys, I would say I never had a moment to myself.  I was the perfect example of the mother who tried to be everything to all.

When Blake was born, perfectionism came to a standstill. I was faced with a child that told me blatantly that life, as I knew it was not perfect.  He was born with a heart defect, had to have 2 blood transfusions and later find out that the doctors did not think he was going to make it.  My priorities quickly shifted.  Blake needed my daily attention and I had to quit work.  This was difficult for a person that identified with her job.  I didn’t know who I was, never took the time to find out.  Blake essentially forced me to go inward and discover who I really was.

I had always wanted to be an artist and never would think in a million years that it could ever happen.  Just allowing myself to have this dream was a gift from Blake.  He made me realize that life is too short, that it is important to know who you are, to take risks and be strong.  Blake’s courage daily with a smile, gave me courage.  As he learned to crawl and walk, (no easy accomplishment), I learned to draw and paint.  There were no excuses.

Today I celebrate Blake’s Birthday with a tear of joy, thanking God that I was given this precious gift.  Blake is my teacher.  He teaches me daily, what a wise person he is.

Gifts from Blake, never give up, always have a smile, believe the best in people, patience, kindness, generosity, think of others first, always do your best, you can accomplish a lot more than you know and each day is a blessing, especially your Birthday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLAKE!

Columns and alabaster stairs

The crowd emerges to praise the king

A box containing crowning glory

To be worn by only him

Nothing for the woman to adorn

Not even a flower for her hair

How can this be?

Is her worthiness reflected?

Authority and ritual of the norm

All is left are ruins found

Each piece dissolves within her hand

Entropy of the form revealing formless once again

Illusions of others have no power

She creates the life that she has now

Twitterville

     This is the 6th painting of my CityScape Series.  Although, this was a painting inspired by photos taken from San Francisco, it also was inspired subliminally from Twitter.  When choosing subject matter to paint, I often just rely on my gut feeling, definitely not the head, until it gets to the critical aspects of the creating.  But at first, I listen to the intuitive messages I am receiving from the initial choice of subject.  As a result, many times I don’t realize what the painting is saying to me, until I start painting it.  Color, scale and composition all play an important part of the process.  So for me, this was quite a surprise, when I realized that I might be painting pieces of Twitter.  I was painting my own little Twitterville, having the same characteristics of Twitter in many ways, large city, large venue, yet close up in nature, noticing many layers and depths of the scene as Twitter has.  Many things happening at once, others ignored, many on their own journey passing others, some dreaming about their future, some barely making it, some deep in thought, philosophical, symbolic nature, some seeking and searching, while others are satisfied with day to day acquaintances .  There is no right or wrong way to use Twitter, each person definitely has their own style, their own way, their own canvas.

Painting Oil on Canvas: 24″ X 48″

Vibration of the oneness calling me

Echoing, radiating, purity of love

To be found in a one inch equation

Blessed by the water

Who was the word

The beginning 

The End

Strings, circular, vibrating

The harmonic sound of love.

Oh God you pierce my heart
Your love poureth through me
making highways for others to travel
You have taken down my defenses
You have let others follow with love
You’ve made me see the depth
of which I can love and be loved.
You have taken me into spiritual time
where all grievances are forgotten.
You call me to love and be loved
You are love

Her profile

How strong it is

Reflecting the light

Silhouetted by shadow

A cigarette hung from her mouth

Red

Who are you?

Why does this passion stir you?

“I AM alive you see, for the first time.”

“I know who I AM, thanks to the one who knows,

 the butterfly of coolness”.

Coolness no longer in her heart

She was taught and also remembered who she was meant to be.

Forget no more

She is on Fire

And will no longer feel the coolness of indifference

No worries

No memory

I AM.

Coincidence of smiles
Advance intuition
No need to talk
Or even write
All understood
Other ways of communicating
Only for a few
Chosen ones because of belief
Not imagination
But it plays a part
On a boat flowing down the river
Not a destination
Being

Tip toe, tip toe, the heart of the ego,
demands attention from its pain.
Darkness it chooses, where light may abode in
preference of a joyful state
Sleep, sleep, where heavens meet,
temporarily detached
where is the soul
no curtains separate the There from Now.

“A hero ventures forth from the world of common day into a region of supernatural wonder: fabulous forces are there encountered and a decisive victory is won: the hero comes back from this mysterious adventure with the power to bestow boons on his fellow man.” Joseph Campbell

You will receive the call many times in your life. This may be the beginning of your call, the call to go deeper. You can struggle with this call and you can also refuse it, but it will come back again and again, giving you another chance. The voice may get weaker and weaker each time you ignore it and it also can get louder in the end when it is the last hope begging you to take the leap, the leap of faith. There are peak times in our life when it is imperative to answer to the call or refusal will leave you with regrets that you did not answer and follow. When you do take the leap, there will be supernatural aid to help. You are only asked to say yes to the call and it seems that it is as if helping hands from the universe were always there. You may feel when you answer this call that you are crossing a threshold and entering a magical area and are swallowed into the unknown. This is where the transformation occurs for you, you have gone inward to be reborn again. As any hero, you may be faced with many trials, which could show themselves as temptations and fear. But fear not there will be benign powers everywhere supporting your passage. You will grow, dissolving past grievances, beliefs that do not support you and transcend into a different state of consciousness.

Are you willing to hear the Call? Will you say yes to the Call?

I am on my own path and my own journey. No two journeys are alike.

“There is a passage in the Old French Queste del Saint Graal that epitomizes the true spirit of Western man. It tells of a day when the nights of Arthur’s court gathered in the banquet hall waiting for dinner to be served. It was a custom of that court that no meal should be served until an adventure had come to pass. Adventures came to pass frequently, so there was no danger of Arthur’s people going hungry. On the present occasion the Grail appeared, covered with a samite cloth, hung in the air a moment and withdrew. Everyone was exalted, and Gawain, the nephew of King Arthur rose and suggested a vow. ‘I propose’, he said, ‘that we all now set forth in quest to behold the Grail unveiled’. And so it was that they agreed. Each entered the forest at the point that he himself had chosen where it was darkest and there was no way or path.”

“No way or path! Because where there is a way or path, it is someone else’s path. And that is what marks the Western spirit distinctly from the Eastern. Oriental gurus accept responsibility for their disciples’ lives. They have an interesting term, ‘delegated free will.’ The guru tells you where you are on the path, who you are, what to do now and what to do next. –quotes from Joseph Campbell

So remember that when we are on this journey together, we are each on our own path, no comparison, no judgement, no gurus. Follow your Bliss, follow your own path.